David J. Williams

From a packed late Sunday showing on a gorgeous spring evening alongside the Potomac River . . . .

What I Liked:

(1) Abrams being ballsy enough to take the franchise in a radically different direction. Of course, if this parallel universe business takes off, then we’re going to get endless permutations of reboots, but that’s a lot better than the same ol’ stuff. This was a bold move, and it looks to be repaid fully in box office glory.

(2) The Evil Starship, complete with Evil Interior Decorations.  Not a cushion in sight  . . .

(3) That giant drill sequence.  That’s the part I’ll watch again and again on the DVD. And I won’t be the only one.

(4) Watching the dude in the red suit get sucked into the drill.  Probably the only coy inside joke I thought they got mileage out of.

(5) Planet becomes singularity, wrecks everybody’s day.  If you ever see this in real life, just run.

Not So Much:
(1) Kirk seemed like he was far more likely to win the Darwin Awards than end up in command of a ship.  The bit where he opened the pod’s hatch and traipsed off into a wilderness he knew nothing about was particularly classic.

(2) I’m not an expert on military law/justice .. but .  . once you’ve beaten up people on a ship’s bridge and been banished from that ship, I don’t think you’re still in the chain of command anymore.

(3) Eric Bana just wasn’t doing it for me as a super villain.  Though he scored some points with that brain-beetle. . .  .

(4) All the women on the Enterprise have skirts that go down to their belly-buttons.  I appreciated this aesthetically, but c’mon.  After a while, the future started to feel like a big frat-party.

(5) The awards ceremony at the end.  Brought back blacked-out flashbacks of the last scene of STAR WARS . . .

All in all:  delivered what it was supposed to, though I find myself unable to hail it as the second coming like everyone on Twitter seems to be doing.  Must be a zeitgeist thing . .

Tune in tomorrow for a chance to win copies of BURNING SKIES!