Economy, meet wall

With another 800 billion tossed into the mix, the bailout(s) is reaching mindboggling proportions, and those in charge of it are pretty much making up the rules as they go, hoping to somehow borrow their way out of this mess. This latest move is aimed at consumer lending; it’s unclear to me how that’s really going to help, given that more consumer borrowing is precisely what we don’t need—and cash-strapped citizens are unlikely to step up and do their patriotic duty by continuing to Shop/Spend anyway. Meanwhile, the first, Wall Street-focused bailout (back when 700 billion seemed like a lot) trundles along pretty much immune to oversight.  My predictions are as follows:

—Paulson’s friends are going to get even richer than they already are

—The giant sucking sound you’re about to hear will be the U.S. dollar once it turns out there are way too many of them

—We may have bought our way out of the last downturn (2001), but we’ll eventually realize that our efforts to do the same for this one have only stirred the shit up to unholy proportions

—Paulson may not realize he’s being set up as Number One Scapegoat, but a lot of us will laugh when it happens.

—Can’t we start spending money on shit that will actually be useful when all this fucking money’s worthless?

—Aren’t you glad that Bush 43 failed to privatize social security?

2 Responses to “Economy, meet wall”

  1. Brian Says:

    I hope you didn’t make any references to dollars being used as currency in your newest book. Is it too late to get a quick edit to some other currency? Too bad gold isn’t holding out either. Given that gas is nearly free again, I guess it’s all coming out in the wash. I’m going SUV shopping. I hear there are great deals to be had. What recession?

    Yo, Mr Car Salesman! Can I get 2 plasma TVs mounted up in this mofo? Yeah bitches!

    Suggested reading: and specifically today’s entry on Bush v Clinton (“Socialism” Versus “Capitalism” In Modern America) and Hold Your Nose! Bail We Must! Scrooge Not! Spend As If Your Life Depends On It! (It does!)

  2. Captain Syphilis Says:

    Bailout 2008, a poem by David Jeffrey

    Like a bloodied warrior,
    laying broken and torn.

    Like a dying soldier, hopeless and forlorn.

    But the blood, it be green,
    the color of money.

    And the soldier is an economy,
    and it is anything but funny.

    Broken are it’s people and shattered are their dreams.

    Thanks to the ultra rich and their full proof schemes.

    It is a tragedy with more pain to come.

    Finance will be Hell, and their wills will be done.